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  His balls tightened and his cock throbbed. How he wanted to have his wicked way with the man and fuck him until he screamed for mercy. But mostly, he just wanted to spend his life with his soul mate, and something told him Drew might be it.

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  Chapter Three

  Drew quivered and quaked as he joined the Christmas party. He was a jumble of emotions, but mostly impatient to find his Secret Santa and hoped more than ever it was Ryan.

  Platters flowing with hors d'oeuvres, Christmas candies and cookies filled tables against two walls. Up on a makeshift stage at the head of the room, a DJ spun music. Lights merrily twinkled all over.

  As he moved deeper into the room, Drew took inventory of everybody's costumes. Reindeer stomped their hooves to the Christmas beat. Fat fluffy snowmen slid around the floor. Mr. and Mrs. Claus rubbed noses then boogied down in the centre of the dance floor. A group of old-time, turn-of-the-century Christmas carollers sang over the DJ's music, their harmony a balm to his ears.

  He spied a lime-green Grinch with a sack of stolen Christmas booty, dancing sugar plums, and robotic nutcrackers.

  Then his gaze widened on a scarier creature, an inhumanly tall being in a greyish-black cape and hood. When its face moved out of the shadows, he jumped back. It was hideously ghoulish.

  To his further horror, the robes parted and other demonic faces popped out eliciting shrill screams. The creature angled at him.

  Drew froze, wondering if he'd stepped into a nightmare.

  Behind them, someone sang frightening karaoke as other people moaned and the din of voices grew louder. Someone bumped him and his drink splashed onto his outfit, sending him a few steps closer to the fiend.

  As he hurriedly moved back, a spooky voice called out, “I'm the Ghost of Christmas Future. Come with me for your last chance at redemption."

  "No, thank you,” Drew said and rushed away into the midst of the crowd.

  He wondered which masked figure was Ryan, and he chafed for the secret Santa gift exchange. He had picked the receptionist and had a box of dangly chandelier earrings wrapped up and warming his pocket.

  "Are you looking for me, oh glorious king?” Angie's voice crooned by his ear. Her breath reeked of spirits, and she tittered even more than usual.

  His heavy Wiseman's crown shifted, and he straightened it with one hand as he carried his gifts of myrrh and incense for the special baby in the other.

  Drew turned and stared at the vision of Mary riding a donkey, her belly swollen with child. As usual, she'd gone all out on her costume and the donkey she was ‘riding’ was life-size and believable.

  "I'm looking for my Secret Santa."

  "I thought you were Drew.” She sidled up to him and laid her head on his shoulder.

  Uncomfortable, he put her away from him and looked around. “Isn't Joseph waiting for you?"

  "Shouldn't you be watching for the star in the sky?” she asked in a miffed tone and stomped off with her nose in the air.

  Drew milled around and still didn't see anyone who looked like Ryan. His heart grew colder with each moment.

  Damn! Ryan wasn't here. He probably wasn't his Secret Santa.

  His mind spun. So who was? Would his Christmas now be worse than if he'd spent it alone? The last thing he needed was an Angie coming onto him all Christmas Eve.

  * * * *

  Ryan played his part well, getting into the character of his ghost. Still he couldn't wait for the secret Santa gift exchange so he could ditch the costume and not feel like such a pariah. It didn't help that the heavy costume made his head ache and his shoulders tense.

  He kept his eye on Drew and followed him from a safe distance all the while longing to take him in his arms and give him lip lock. Drew's lips would taste sweeter than the Christmas chocolate or Drew's own Christmas cookies. Their joining would be so special his heart would remember it forever.

  If there was a coupling...

  Finally, after what seemed like hours of torment and waiting, the DJ turned off the music and the CEO took the microphone. After making his annual speech of cheer, peace on earth, and patting himself on the back, he announced it was time for the costume judging. “But,” he added with a ho ho ho, “Do not unveil yourself until after the prizes have been awarded or you'll be disqualified. Every one parade around the room, and the costumes will be judged. Who wants to win first place?"

  Scads of hands went up and the floor shook with the thunder of lots of jumping. Excited yells pierced Ryan's ear drums and he put his hands over his ears until it died down.

  "We'll have the gift exchange after the contest is over and the unveiling takes place."

  Ryan noted that everyone gave him wide berth as if he really was the Ghost of Christmas Future. He crossed his fingers that the judges would like his scary costume, that they wouldn't be prejudice towards one that wasn't sickening sweet, glittery and glitzy.

  A short while later, the CEO announced, “Our judges have picked the winners."

  Everyone grew quiet and crowded the stage. Excitement thrummed through the room, and he couldn't stop fidgeting.

  The boss paused with an evil grin. After a very pregnant pause he said, “And our third place prize for one hundred dollars goes to the Wiseman."

  Ryan looked around and clapped as a Wiseman took centre stage and accepted a crisp one hundred dollar bill and a framed certificate.

  When the clapping and cheering died down, the CEO announced, “The second placed prize for two hundred dollars goes to the blessed mother on the donkey."

  Again, riotous cheering and clapping thundered through the room as Mary rode up to stage on her donkey.

  Ryan held his breath and folded his hands in prayer. His muscles tensed, and he was petrified, his eyes glued to the announcer. He was sick and tired of his old bathroom décor and leaky pipes.

  What felt like an eternity later, the big boss asked, “Are you ready to find out our grand prize winner?"

  Cat calls and whistles assaulted Ryan's ears.

  "Hurry up already! This is cruel and inhumane punishment."

  The man just smiled and his lips caressed the mike. “Who do you think the winner is?"

  Several people pointed to Ryan, but many conflicting voices rang out. Ryan's knees ached they were so stiff.

  "If you said the Ghost of Christmas Future, you're right! Come on down. You're the grand prize winner of five hundred dollars."

  Ryan expelled his breath, and his shoulders slumped in relief. He pulled the strings so that his scary faces popped out and screamed as he marched up to the stage.

  The sea of people parted as he approached, but he doubted it was in reverence. He didn't care. His heart soared. He'd never won first place at a company contest before. Angie wouldn't lord over him again.

  He took his prize with gratitude. “Thank you,” he said in his best ghostly voice and made his costume come to life one last time for the night. He couldn't wait to discard it and go back to being himself.

  The CEO shook his hand and clapped him on the back. “Good job. Very creative."

  Ryan thanked the man again and stood with the second and third place runner ups to have their pictures taken.

  Several moments later when the flash bulbs stopped blinding him and his eyes could focus again, the head of human resources lifted her voice. “It's time we unveil ourselves and have our Secret Santa exchange. Some of us have to travel out of town and leave early in the morning, so I don't want to hold them up any longer."

  Another cheer broke out, and the DJ turned up the Christmas music.

  Ryan ducked into the men's room and stepped out of his costume then folded it neatly so he could use it again next Halloween on Trick or Treat. Then he found his present for Drew and looked for the man.

  Everybody else milled about looking for their secret someone, too, so it was a few moments before Ryan spotted him. He smiled when he saw that Drew was dressed as one of the three kings who had bestowed gifts o
n the Christ child, and thus, one of the winners.

  His pulse raced, and he quivered with fear and hope. He gave himself a pep talk, painted a smile on his face and forced his feet to move forward until he stood facing the man of his dreams, blocking his way.

  Drew didn't say a word, just looked at him with questions in his lovely blue eyes.

  Ryan plucked up his courage and held out his last Secret Santa gift to Drew. “Merry Christmas, Drew. I'm your Secret Santa."

  He held his breath as Drew murmured a barely audible, “Thank you,” then opened his gift.

  He whispered, “I hope you'll like it, that you liked the other gifts."

  Drew started to say something when Emma from Shipping bounded up and thrust a tiny gift under Ryan's nose.

  "I'm your Secret Santa. Here! Happy holidays.” Before he could stop her, she grabbed his lapels and pulled her to him and kissed him soundly on the lips. Then she slipped away and joined a group of women who all pointed and waved at him.

  "Your girlfriend?” Drew asked, his face as much a mask as when he'd worn a mask over his eyes.

  Ryan wanted a time machine so he could go back and stop that cursed kiss. Instead he said, “No.” In a lower voice he whispered to Drew, “I don't want a girlfriend. Did you like the gifts I gave you?"

  It seemed like several painful hours went by before Drew said in a low, rich voice, “Very much. I hoped you were my Secret Santa."

  Ryan's heart burst with joy, and he almost leaped in the air. But he subdued himself and gazed deeply into Drew's eyes. “You did? You mean...?"

  Drew nodded. “I hope I mean what you mean. Let's take this somewhere private so we can talk."

  "My place is close by and private.” Ryan wanted to take Drew home with him so badly he hung on the other man's reply. Although the night was warm, even for South Florida in December, a cold chill ran up his spine at the thought of spending another night alone, of Drew backing out on their Christmas Eve dinner and leaving him bereft.

  "Your place is as good as mine,” Drew finally said. “Just give me a minute to deliver my Secret Santa gift and I'll be right with you."

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  Chapter Four

  Drew did a jig across the room he was so very giddy. Surely he was not misreading Ryan. Surely the other man was interested in him.

  But as he looked around at his co-workers, he wondered if there would be speculation if he left the party with Ryan. Worse, he feared they would face discrimination and maybe even sanction.

  So he tried to make it seem that he was merely mingling and didn't return to Ryan immediately despite the man's worried frown. When he finally reached Ryan, he said, “Write down the address and directions, and I'll meet you there. I'll leave about fifteen minutes after you."

  Ryan's eyes narrowed, but he nodded. He wandered to the bar and came back with a drink and slipped a paper into Drew's hand. “My phone's there, too. Call if you get turned around."

  Drew stuffed the paper into his pocket, and it burned against his heart. He nodded and moved along. How he wished he could put his arm through Ryan's and walk out with him as Angie was leaving with Mel.

  Each minute, seemed to tick by excruciatingly slow. Fifteen minutes felt like an hour. He hoped it was enough time to throw anyone off their trail.

  He couldn't wait to drink of Ryan's lips, to splay his hands across his broad, naked shoulders, to explore every inch of his rugged body. He couldn't believe this gem had been so close for so long, and he'd not noticed until now. But now that he had, he'd cherish Ryan and give him his all.

  His adrenaline pumping, Drew line-danced to Billy Ray, and then did the Thriller to Michael Jackson, and finally did the bump with his friend Maggie after Ryan was safely gone. After each dance he covertly checked his watch and after each dance, he swiped perspiration from his brow.

  Feeling like a super spy, the bumbling variety like Maxwell Smart, he checked around him before he left, as he was leaving, and after he left. A touch of anger made him purse his lips. If he was going to meet a woman, he wouldn't have to feel guilty or be careful. He could have left with her, and no one would have said a word.

  But he was a realist, so he blew it off. One day he'd stand up for his rights, but not on Christmas. He was too filled with the spirit of love and peace, too excited to find out if he was on target about Ryan.

  He couldn't keep the bounce out of his step as he made his way to Ryan's door. The pulse in his thumb hammered when he pushed the bell.

  He was charmed by the warmth of multi-coloured Christmas lights twinkling around Ryan's windows and porch railings. He cracked a grin at the faux snow piled up around the palm trees in the front yard. He loved whimsical. He wished he'd thought of it.

  He had a good feeling about Ryan. Judging from his costume and the sexy toys he'd given him, Ryan was a fun guy. He'd never be boring.

  That gave him pause, and he chewed his lower lip. Would Ryan find him too boring like Lonnie had? Was he going to go through an instant replay?

  Standing on the stoop, he paused for awhile struggling with his dilemma. He couldn't take another Lonnie. He couldn't survive being crushed twice.

  He didn't know how minutes passed, but the floodlight went dim from lack of motion and he was in the dark except for the tiny Christmas twinkle lights. Even the stars were covered by dark clouds.

  He wrestled with himself and finally won. Jutting up his chin several notches, he rapped his knuckles against the door. Then he held his breath, hoping the other man hadn't changed his mind, or worse, that he wasn't gay at all.

  About two seconds later, the door swung wide and Ryan stepped up and stared deeply into his eyes. “Merry Christmas,” he said huskily, his eyes smouldering. Then he took Drew into his arms, bent him back and gave him the most moving kiss he'd ever experienced.

  Jumping out of his stupor, Drew curled his arms around Ryan's neck and gave him back kiss for kiss, thrusting his tongue deep into Ryan's mouth.

  He traced the cavern of Ryan's mouth, tasting his flavour, and fucked his mouth. Only when he gasped for air did he break the kiss.

  Ryan pulled him to his feet and into the cradle of his arms. Against his throat, Ryan murmured, “We'd better take this inside."

  Panting, his knees weak, Drew nodded. He glanced over his shoulder as his senses returned. Someone they knew could have seen them, unlikely as it was. He didn't know if Ryan had come out to his neighbours, so it was doubly dangerous for him.

  He stepped away from the warmth of Ryan's arms and immediately was struck by chills.

  Ryan kicked shut the door then closed the distance again, taking him into his arms. “You liked my presents?” he asked against Drew's lips.

  Drew nodded and moaned. “Those were the best I've ever received. How did you know I was gay? Am I that transparent?"

  Ryan cupped his cheek with his palm and smiled. “I didn't know, but I hoped with all my heart. When we bumped into each other that day in the hall, it was as if lightning had struck. Didn't you feel it, too?"

  Remembering all too well, Drew could still feel the electricity. “How could I miss it?"

  Ryan traced Drew's lips with the tip of his tongue and sniffed appreciatively. “You smell like gingerbread and peppermint."

  Drew couldn't help but smile. “You like it?” When Ryan nodded, he explained, “I'm a baking fool. I've baked cookies every night for the past two weeks. My dream is to open a bakery and sell special cookies."

  Drew held his breath, hoping Ryan wouldn't snicker. The only other people he'd entrusted with his secret were his brother and Lonnie—and Lonnie had merely placated him.

  Ryan's smile grew larger, and he rubbed his nose to Drew's. The corners of his eyes crinkled. “That's an awesome dream. Have you done anything to make it come true?” He took Drew's hand and led him to his living room where Christmas music softly played and the tree sparkled.

  Drew scowled and looked at his feet as he sat beside Ryan. Embarrassed, he
admitted, “I'm sorry to say I haven't."

  "Why not? You should go for your dreams."

  "It takes a lot of money and time to start such a venture. It'd be a lot of hard work.” Drew let Ryan pull him against his side and snuggled up. He curled his feet underneath him on the couch.

  "Are there any other deterrents?"

  "Like what?” Drew couldn't think of anything else.

  Ryan shifted and pulled him onto his lap and nuzzled his neck. His long hair tickled Drew, and he shivered.

  He tried to think about Ryan's question, but he was getting fuzzy from Ryan's musky scent. “I'm not sure what you mean. Other deterrents?"

  "Health? Skill? Talent?” Ryan ran his fingers through Drew's short hair and massaged his scalp.

  Drew wriggled and moaned some more. He lifted his hand and traced Ryan's strong jaw, loving the feel of his day-old growth of stubble.

  "No. Nothing major. What about you? Do you have any dreams?"

  Ryan stared into the distance, and his gaze became hazy. His lips softened, and his shoulders slumped. “I wanted to play major league ball. But I had an injury in the minor leagues so I was out. That dream's gone with the wind."

  Drew's heart went out to the other man, and he curled his fingers around Ryan's neck and drew down his face until their lips touched. He kissed him with all the commiseration and understanding in his soul.

  Soon the kiss turned into something else. Passion crept in as Ryan twisted and stretched out beside him on the couch so that they lay side by side.

  They wrapped around each other and rubbed against each other's feverish bodies. Drew's heart pounded so hard he knew Ryan had to feel it as he felt Ryan's.

  Annoyed with their clothing, he asked on a ragged breath, “Do you want me to get the sex toys out of the car?” Honestly, he wasn't sure he could wait that long and cursed himself for forgetting them in the trunk.

  Ryan shook his head. “I bought a duplicate set for me. We'll use mine. They're in my bedroom."

  Ryan wiggled out from beneath him and stood. Taking Drew's hand, he helped him up and led him down the hall to the third door, all the while kissing and nipping. His hand rubbed the bulge in Drew's pants, and he winked. “I'm glad you liked the cock ring."